Like a lone wolf in the night he stalks...

Monday, March 21, 2011

Listen to what the Man says???

Well humble followers (Still weird to say that) I've reached the crossroads one more time. Yes the man has stuck it to yours truly one more time and shipped his employee status overseas. But it's merely par for the course for so many I already know and so many more across this deteriorating country of ours.

This was a new experience for me as I actually trained the guys taking my much needed J-O-B. I can say it sucked just as much losing my job to someone cheaper who won't get paid for overtime and has no conceptual framework for the American Dream of greed than it did just getting a pat on the back and and a "thanks for playing" in layoffs past.  Speaking of greed, I do have and love my 46 inch flat screen and HD TV but it's really the only thing I've splurged on in like 5 years and I use it every day.  The rest of a good chunk of my salary has gone to paying back the man for the collective year I was out of work with no unemployment check to help me. I've done quite well all things considered and managed to whittle what was once a very scary amount (for me) of credit card debt to one that is not so scary but still a pain in my ass. Coupled with my educational pain (loans) at the Acting Program that served me well up until I decided to not continue to be a professional actor any longer, I still have quite a ways to go and I really don't want to wake up 20 years from now and still have the same bills. So to the man who's listed on Forbes list who just gave my job to India just to collect a few more bucks in his already full pockets, I have this to say to you: You don't get to take it with you jackass!

Seriously, between big corps selling off the fatted cow and the other end of the spectrum being happy doing nothing but collecting free dough off  the backs of a the working people (no different than the corps IMO) everyone is being too fucking greedy. When we hear about Japan and how people helped each other and no one would even consider looting the places of destruction, it gets you thinking just how far both sides of the coin need to wake up. Bottom line, even as bad as it is right now, it's still better than 90% of the rest of the world. So I enter into the unknown once more unabated and wiser...  

I should be really pissed off but today as I had to verbally hand off my workload to my joke of a boss this afternoon. But I find myself enjoying the prospect of having a new opportunity to find something I actually want to do and get paid for.  I've also got a new motivation that I did not have before, I now have a 2 year daughter and she means the world to me. A major difference this time around. As she continues to grow and learn new things every day (as well as say them it seems) I find myself wanting to find that position sooner than later. But I also find myself wanting her to remember that Daddy loved his work and be inspired by that fact as the years pass.  I don't think that's too much to ask, even in this currently fucked state of events.

You only get one shot in this life to live it and I'll be damned if I'm going to let this setback trip me up. I've let too many harder ones before this push me into a place I didn't really want to go in the past. It's not going to be all roses and sunshine as my wife is already in full "get-a-job-now" mode. I get it though, she remembers all too well how lost I got the last time. Actions speak louder than words on that score and I intend to hit the ground running this time. I married a good woman to be sure and I know that one day we'll (all of us) look back on this  crazy ass time and laugh. I look forward to that time and quite honestly something inside me keeps telling me it's not that far away.

I have had a sense of optimism since the year began and I can't really put my finger on why. The last time I had that feeling I ended up signing with Abrams Artists Talent Agency and the times before that everything turned out for the better. The voice inside me keeps mantra-ing "Don't worry, this is for the best."

So I'll be listening to what that Man says- cause he's all I've ever really listened to and he's gotten me this far, which in the grand scheme of things, ain't a bad place to be.

Special shout out to my former roomie Nick, I need a kick in the ass every now and again and yours came at the perfect time. So raise a chalice and smile. THE WOLF IS BACK BABY!!!!!!

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